Dating a girl from high school

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Let me write something for you. When the appointed day came around, I was given the four essay prompts before lunch.

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I spent my lunch break mulling over the question of what sort of high school dating relationship I could possibly approve of. After lunch, my students quietly read Hamlet while I typed. A little less than an hour later, I read them the following essay:. The problem with high school relationships is that they do not matter. They do not exist for a greater purpose. However, the high school couple has no great labor.

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The high school relationship is neither productive nor creative and serves no useful purpose, as marriage does, for marriages produce children and in producing children, reward stability and fixedness. On the other hand, the high school relationship exists primarily for itself and for the enjoyment of the two persons involved. Unlike marriage, which contributes to the stability and longevity of society, the high school couple typically infuses something quite awkward into a situation.

A married couple with children want to have others into their home, while dating high schoolers want to be alone. There is no important service they provide, no problem they solve. They have fun together; however, having fun is simply not all that important, and so when high school couples fall apart, none of their friends suffer real loss. Often enough, as soon as dating high schoolers realize their relationship is ultimately unnecessary and only exists for the sake of their having fun, it seems a bit pretend, becomes hard to take seriously, and soon thereafter falls apart.

If a high school relationship is to be of value, then, it must more accurately approximate a real marriage. When young people have been raised to believe the primary value of romance is fun, they are poorly postured to undertake marriages which last, for most marriages go through long passages wherein work is constant and fun scarce.

While I have little confidence in my own ability to set up a guide which can make a high school relationship last through to marriage, I would like to propose something else: an approach to dating in high school which stands to improve whatever marriage awaits the couple Dating a girl from high school they break up and go their separate ways.

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Many marriages last because husband and wife have something ificant to lose if the marriage falls apart. Likewise, a high school sophomore who wants to date a girl should have something ificant to lose if the relationship does not last. I would suggest a thousand dollars.

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If the couple remain in a dating relationship for one full year, the young man can have half the money back. If the couple can last eighteen months, the young man may have the rest of his money back. In the meantime, if the couple breaks up for any reason, the young woman keeps all the money. While I think it unfair to reduce romance to a fiscal concern, entirely removing the practical and fiscal aspect of romance from high school relationships is what makes them so dangerous, so unrealistic, and so likely doomed to failure.

If the young man must produce a handsome sum of cash up front before he can begin dating, he begins early to connect labor and love. If he wants to date a girl, he has incentive to work hard, scrimp and save, and spend less on himself.

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He will also be far choosier about who he dates. If he pursues a flighty girl simply because she is pretty or popular, he knows he is likely to lose his money.

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Likewise, a flighty young man is more likely to abort his interest in a girl halfway through the accumulation of the needed sum and thus the young woman is saved from spending her feelings and time on some low-rent huckster. He will know that if the relationship begins to drift too far into the realm of fun and amusement, the girl has an incentive to walk away from it, because a thousand dollars is far more fun than a sophomore boy who wants you to watch him play Minecraft.

Of course, these are exactly the sort of tasks which characterize much of married life. If the couple comes to understand their usefulness to others, they have much stronger reasons to stay together. When a relationship exists primarily for the sake of fun, profitable tasks merely get in the way. The sort of people who are only interested in a good time are never fixed in purpose. As a reader and great admirer of proverbs, it is my goal here to submit the high school dating relationship to one of the most painful trials known to man: Put your money where your mouth is.

The problem with many high school dating relationships is that they come into existence without ever being tested, without any real sacrifice, without any genuine risk. Where your money is, there will your heart be also, teaches Christ, which means the father who is approached by a young man with a thousand dollars in hand should be Dating a girl from high school.

Any young man who is willing to do such a thing is in earnest, has calculated his risks, cannot be trifled with, and has earned the benefit of the doubt. Joshua Gibbs teaches online classes at GibbsClassical. His wife is generous and his children are funny. The opinions and arguments of our contributing writers do not necessarily reflect those of the Institute or its leadership. View the discussion thread. The mission of the CiRCE Institute is to support teachers and parents who want to cultivate wisdom and virtue in their students through the Dating a girl from high school of Christian classical education.

Your gift enables this work. What Is Classical Education? Lewis Lectures Posters. Donate back. Search form Search. Donate Log in Cart 0. The Cedar Room. Joshua Gibbs. May 12, A little less than an hour later, I read them the following essay: The problem with high school relationships is that they do not matter.

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Dating a girl from high school

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The Pros and Cons of Dating in High School