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By Helen Carroll for the Daily Mail. Two months ago three couples bravely spoke to F about their mismatched libidos, and how it affected their marriages. While one partner claimed to be pretty much always in the mood, the other often felt pressured to have sex when they had little desire to do so. So we gave the partners with lower libidos a challenge. Would it highlight cracks in their relationships — or bring them closer together?
All three couples kept diaries for four weeks. Scroll down for video. Stacey Powell left39, and wife Vanessa, 45 righthave been married for 12 years. While Stacey would like sex every night, Vanessa says juggling work and family has sapped her libido. Stacey Powell, 39, an architect, and wife Vanessa, 45, a receptionist, have been married for 12 years and live in Surrey with their two daughters. Sex Score:. Week 1: Twice. Week 2: Wife always wants sex.
Week 3: Once. Week 4: Twice. Total: Six times. Even more thrillingly, Vanessa actually makes the first move — I cannot remember the last time that happened. I spend all the next day fantasising about what will happen later, but after a couple of glasses of wine we both collapse into bed and fall asleep. You bet! I wake up in the mood when the alarm goes off at 6. Stacey was really excited at the prospect of the experiment and being able to make love to his wife more often.
Stacey Wife always wants sex that keeping a diary has been great for the couple, putting sex at the forefronts of their minds and not allowing it to fall off the agenda. The next two nights Wife always wants sex is out with friends.
I suspect Vanessa is a little frustrated, and that feels great after years of pestering her for sex. We finally make love a week after the iron incident. Keeping a diary has been great for putting sex at the forefront of our minds and not allowing it to slip off our busy agendas. Vanessa was surprised Stacey didn't take more advantage of the situation and was astonished one night when she propositioned him and he turned her down.
I love feeling close to my wife and, best of all, knowing that she now actively wants to make love to me, rather than just doing it to appease me. He was feeling tired. We decide to give it another go the following night but, after a couple of drinks, sleep becomes a far more appealing prospect for both of us. But when I invite Stacey to me in bed the next evening, his face lights up. Sex twice in one week is unheard of for us. The second week starts with me having a night away. Stacey is raring to go when I return.
Vanessa feels like the experiment has really helped her and Stacey connect as a couple both physically and Wife always wants sex - reminding them that they're not just parents but also lovers. I seduce him in the living room by the light of the twinkling Christmas fairy lights. Rebecca Morris-Jackson, 40, a legal secretary, and husband Paul, 35, a chef, live in Bromley, South-East London, with their two sons, Charlie, nine months, and Jack, 21 months.
Rebecca would like sex every night while Paul is satisfied making love twice a week.
Week 1: three times. Week 2: five times. Week 3: twice. Week 4: six times. Total: 16 times. While I spend the first day excited about the prospect of guaranteed sex, plans are ruined when Jack is awake from Rebecca, 40, would like sex every night, while her husband Paul, 35, would be satisfied with making love just once a week.
The following night, Paul looks reed when I Wife always wants sex kissing him, though he seems to enjoy himself afterwards. The night after that, realising he might take some persuading, I slip into a silky nightie that usually works. While many women would want to catch up on sleep, sex actually gives me energy, so we make love that night. Rebecca says that while many women would want to catch up on their sleep after a busy week, sex gives her lots of energy.
My period slows things down a bit in week three. It pays off. The sex is very passionate. Entering the final week of the experiment Rebecca realises that she's missing the chase and her and Paul's love life isn't as exciting as it once was. Of course I oblige, under the terms of our experiment, but after the first few nights I feel a bit like a performing seal. Once Wife always wants sex is better, Bec is back on form. While Paul really enjoys it once he gets going, he doesn't like feeling pressured into having sex, he feels like 'sex should be fun, not a chore'.
I was so upset that I cried myself to sleep. Paul Whitney, 36, runs a motor Wife always wants sex business by day and is a security officer by night. Wife Katie, 26, is a carer by day and waitress by night. Paul has three children from a relationship and the couple, from Bridlington, East Yorks, want a baby of their own but, due to their long working hours, they can go for weeks without making love.
Week 1: twice. Week 2: once. Week 3: three times. Week 4: three times. Total: Nine times. Then, on the fifth day I suggest an early night. But neither of our hearts is in it. Katie, 26, and Paul, 36 want of their own but due to their long working hours sometimes they go for weeks at a time without having sex. I move into the spare bedroom. But on the Friday night of the second week we meet up at the pub after work. I feel so happy when she kisses me back and we head upstairs. The sex is great, so much more Wife always wants sex and considerate than the last time. At the start of the third week we share a bath before making love.
We have a meal out with friends on Saturday evening and flirt with one another the whole time. At the start our last week, Katie very sweetly has dinner ready for me when I get home from the garage so we have time in the bedroom before I have to head out to my evening job. Katie and Paul are pictured here on their wedding day. At the start of the experiment Paul thought it could even be the end of their relationship but is very happy with how it's brought them closer as a couple. We spend Sunday afternoon watching a film in bed and Katie, who normally hates lounging around on her days off, is the one to instigate sex.
Instead of letting it fester, as it usually would, I tell her the following morning I felt she was giving me the cold shoulder. But then, a couple of nights later, she more than makes up for it with a whole hour of passion. This has been quite a journey for us. To begin with I thought this experiment might even herald the end of our marriage. Katie feels that making time for sex has had a wider impact on the way she and Paul treat each other, even sending affectionate messages while at work.
However, when we make love again a few days later I feel really sad. Afterwards we just turn over in bed and go to sleep without a word.
For the next few nights I cry myself to sleep, wondering how we could have allowed our marriage to disintegrate in this way. We feel too emotionally raw for sex, but when we do make love two nights later it is really special. Afterwards we wrap our arms around each other and feel closer than we have in years. Katie has realised what a huge impact sex can have on Paul's mood, and the knock-on effect of ridding the tension between them. Making time for sex has a wider impact on the way we treat each other. We find ourselves texting affectionate messages while at work. Things get even better Wife always wants sex the final week.
He mentions that it has been a few days since we last had sex and, instead of getting defensive as I used to, I lead him to the bedroom. The couple feel that keeping the diaries has encouraged them to talk about sex more and has enable Katie to stop obsessively checking her most fertile days, making sex pleasurable again for both of them. Keeping the diaries has actually encouraged us to talk about sex — a lack of it used to be the elephant in the room. Rather than this being the end of the experiment, I see it as the beginning of a new chapter in our marriage.
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When My Wife Wants Sex … But I’m Not Feelin’ It